There is a proverb that goes something like this: “If a man blesses his neighbor in a loud voice early in the morning, it will be counted to him as a curse.” I have thought of that nearly every morning for the last three or four weeks. The stimulus in my case is a disgustingly cheerful robin that echoes his joy of the new day right outside our bedroom windows.
From his perch in the crab apple tree, the twerp tweets an hour or more of his happiness at the apparent beginning of his fresh dawning. If that dawning started a few hours later, I might find some sort of country pleasure in it. But any singer that uses his song to ruin my rest at five-thirty morning after morning after morning is not going to gain favor in my heart. I am becoming suspicious that this particular species got its name from this habit of robbin’ people of their sleep.
Puns aside, I suppose that I could adjust my own sleeping habits and go to bed at eight-thirty so that I would feel quite rested by the time that cheerful revelry begins. Having an exaggerated sense of my place in the universe, though, I am reluctant to make that adjustment. I am more inclined to use whatever means is necessary to alter the bird’s choice of singing platform.
I do not, however, want to become the inspiration for some cartoon segment like the one where the Pink Panther destroys his home trying to get rid of a fly. By the time the fly swatter becomes a bazooka, we know that things are getting out of hand and it is becoming clear that the insect will be the last pest standing.
I would not be the first human in history to worsen his own plight in his fight to make others respect his rights. Maybe I should just quit sleeping so close to the window…
H. Arnett
5/10/11
Reflections by Doc Arnett 