It was a good thing it was small because if something that ugly was big, it would be bad. Very bad. I’m talking about the micro-bathroom on the main floor of this house. It has a toilet and a sink and barely enough room for your feet when you’re using either one of them. It’s forty-six by thirty-seven and we’re talking inches. By most any standards, that’s small. But small is not ugly; this bathroom was ugly.

Overheard, a cheap light fixture loosely attached to two translucent plastic suspended ceiling panels with orange stains from a roof that leaked at some time during the past forty years. At the floor, dark brown rubber base molding with stains of light gray adhesive showing at the seams and corners. In between, three or eight kinds of other ugly, including the cheapest imaginable trim around the doorframe and over the edge joints of the Masonite-type paneling. I haven’t seen that much ugly in that little space since my cousins got in a mud fight.

I took out the dingy plastic ceiling panels, installed drywall overhead and finished with a heavy texture. I patched every hole, seam and gap and repainted the window and walls. I replaced the worn and/or torn floor tile with new squares. I ripped off the door trim and rubber base cove and replaced them with actual molding. I tore the old non-functioning radiator out of the wall and replaced it with a custom built wooden shelf unit. I made a double-step tapered oak threshold to cover the gap and smooth the transition between the bathroom and the entryway. Around the tiny sink, I fastened ceramic tile as a splashguard. Underneath the tiny sink, I installed a tall, narrow wooden box with glossy white paint that matches the porcelain surprisingly well. The fluting helps it look more like a pedestal than a wooden box built to hide the exposed pipes.

Our bathroom is still tiny but I believe that we’ve eliminated all of the ugly and replaced it with something attractive. That’s not completely unlike the work of the Spirit in our hearts, minds and spirits. But in his work, growth is inevitable.

H. Arnett
6/7/10